Up Till Now

| May 16, 2010

            We talk a lot about leadership around the church.  People leading people leading people; that’s kind of the make-up of how any organization works.  Most of the time I think of leadership in terms of working at Life Center and specifically, in our K ministry.  I take principles from books I’m reading or that Mike passes down and put them into practice trying to inspire kids, parents, and volunteers.  Over the past two days, I’ve gotten a crash course in leadership involving my family.

                I’ve come to the thought that a key component in leadership is being able to have the conversations with people that most people don’t want to and/or don’t possess the courage to have.  I had to have a conversation with the ER doctor yesterday deciding if my dad was going to live or die.  Last night I had to have conversations with nurses and doctors regarding his care.  This evening I had to have assertive conversations with different people (including his mother) that they needed to go home.  I’ve had to talk with family and friends, gathering and giving information, while consoling and comforting, yet trying to carry out my dad’s wishes.  The difficult part of this, my dad is a very, very private person.  I didn’t even know he was really sick until a few weeks ago.  I don’t know medicines he’s taken, dates and duration, really anything, let alone have I talked with him about ventilators and DNR.  He has been battling lung cancer and now has double pneumonia, which is why he’s hospitalized.  I’ve been thrust into adulthood by being the son who’s basically in charge of decision making.

                But none of that compares with the conversation I had to have earlier this afternoon.  My little sister is 11 and came by the hospital today.  My dad has sheltered her more than anyone else and didn’t want her to know he had cancer or was even having trouble breathing.  After she mentioned him getting out today or tomorrow, we decided it was best to talk frankly with her.  I can tell you, there’s nothing I’ve ever done that was tougher than that.  When I told her the two options (pneumonia goes away and he can get back to battling cancer, or, his lungs stop working and he’ll die), she broke down while Audra hugged her and I held her hand.  She’s surrounded by family right now away from the hospital and can use your prayers

                Kinda makes me think that leadership isn’t always something continuously flowing out, rather something brought out when the time is needed.  I thank God for the strength to do whatever He calls me to do.  I know He’s here and even though my dad wouldn’t acknowledge it, he has a seeking heart!  I was reading in the Bible tonight from 2 Peter where it’s written, “But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day.  The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.”

          Thank you so much to Audra, Eric, Anna, Sharon, Jeff, Steve, and many others.  It is so nice to have a great group of family and friends rally around and support my dad.  Please be praying specifically for my sister Annabel and Anna, my dad’s girlfriend.  I know those are the two he is most concerned about and they are both pretty shaken and Anna hasn’t been able to rest since bringing him to the hospital Friday.